At last Scotland is a free nation 

Scotland is free, it’s ‘Nicoless’ at last, and I for one will miss her greatly. I do rankle at the money we send up the AI from London to Edinburgh, but we have had a never-ending comedy show in return. From the suggestion that the RAF should pay the Scottish government to continue having the privilege of being based there and, thus, defending Scotland, to the most recent debacle over gender self-identification – it was hard to keep up.

At one level Nicola was merely a mouthpiece for the barrow loads of nonsense espoused by the SNP. But, unlike her predecessor Alex Salmond who delivered his message with the kind of guts and gusto that almost made you wonder if he had a point, Sturgeon exuded oleaceous self-righteousness and spoke such a load of neeps and tatties twaddle that support for the SNP plummeted and she had to go.

Her faux sincerity and sheer blindness to the facts while delivering her missives was a joy to behold. She spoke about Scotland being independent while wilfully refusing to cut the tartan ties to the lucrative Barnett formula which brings them more money, simply for being there, than the total of all Scotland’s exports and revenue from tourism. Presumably that was to prevent the people of Scotland discovering what being independent was really like and telling the SNP to toss their cabers.

In Sturgeon’s lachrymose leaving speech she told journalists that being in politics ‘takes its toll.’ But far from an admission that her policies had taken their toll on the Scottish economy, the Scottish people and Scotland’s credibility, she meant it had taken its toll on her. Well, Nicola, nobody forced you. As Kathleen Stock commented in UnHerd: ‘As if delivering a shocking revelation to her audience, she confided that the real reason was because she was “a human being”. Politics has more “intensity” and “brutality” these days than it used to, she said, and her heart is no longer in it.’ And Scotland sighed with relief.

Stock continued, in fine voice: ‘During her address to journalists, the First Minister’s well-honed rhetorical abilities cast their usual spell — broken only during the Q&A, when she was asked about her legacy of a collapsing NHS, widening attainment gaps in literacy and numeracy in schools, and soaring numbers of drug deaths every year. Before that, though, we were firmly in Sturgeonland, where — a bit like being on a Highland distillery tour — reality tends to disappear in a euphoric haze and temporarily everything looks better than it actually is.’

Obviously, the question arises now of who will succeed Sturgeon. As a like for like—at least in terms of gender (if the SNP can still tell the difference)—there is Kate Forbes, currently on maternity leave but who is the Scottish equivalent of the Chancellor of the Exchequer, who is high on the list. I have no idea what she looks like as in the only recent pictures I can find she is wearing a tartan face mask. This probably tells us all we need to know. She is also a Gaelic-speaker, so that’s nice.

Angus Robertson and John Swinney are also tipped to run but the former, as culture secretary, would appear to be a male version of Nicola (don’t laugh) in terms of having fallen for gender self-identification hook, line and Sturgeon. Swinney has already had a short and undistinguished spell at the helm. Then, at 10 to one odds with William Hill is Humza Yousaf who was health secretary during Covid-19. The prospect of having anyone who presided over Scotland’s lockdown one-upmanship over England and who was in favour of extending mask mandates in charge should fill the rest of the SNP with dread. My guess is that whoever leads the SNP, it will not lead to any immediate improvement in the economy and life in general for the Scottish people.

Roger Watson is a retired academic, editor and writer. He is a columnist with Unity News Network and writes regularly for a range of conservative journals including The Salisbury Review and The European Conservative. He has travelled and worked extensively in the Far East and the Middle East. He lives in Kingston upon Hull, UK.