Unless you routinely shop only at John Lewis/Waitrose or other even more up market emporia, you might not have heard of the phenomenon that is Temu?
For anyone who hasn’t heard (really? where have you been?), Temu is a Chinese business that sells goods online with delivery to your own UK address or convenient pick up points, such as Tesco; since most deliveries in the UK are handled by Evri who don’t, thankfully, collect the goods from China themselves as they do have a reputation for finding even some UK addresses difficult to locate (they have though greatly improved their game).
The Majority of the prices are amazingly cheap compared to either the high street, Amazon or EbayUK, but as all the goods are made in China the quality of some, but in fairness most definitely not all, is frankly terrible. Temu is perhaps best described as ‘The Biggest £shop in the Entire Universe’, although not everything is £1 (some things are even cheaper), and some (beware) are still relatively pricey.
Critics (mainly the kind of people that wouldn’t be seen dead in a branch of Lidl) are quick to demonise the site, its operators, suppliers and those who use it, but typically without actually knowing very much about it. The fact that it is another example of Chinese Communist capitalism capturing the West, with manufactured goods that we can no longer even attempt to make in our overlords’ haste to embrace economy destroying Net Zero, shouldn’t though be overlooked. The right-on fraternity assert that the goods are made and packed by slave labour in awful conditions and particularly by Uighur Moslems (some controversially might secretly admire the way China deals with its own perceived Islamic problems, but I couldn’t possibly comment).
Shopping on Temu isn’t though just a straightforward question of picking a wanted item, paying, e.g. through PayPal, and it being delivered, because there are literally dozens of identical or very similar items on offer, but all at quite different prices. Plumping for the first thing that pops up in any search isn’t advisable, and using the filtering by price option usually reveals the same thing at a significantly lower price.
What does Temu sell? It’s hard to think of anything (UK legal) that they don’t retail, apart possibly from perishable foodstuffs. I freely admit that I’m hooked, but have always enjoyed browsing in Poundland, and its ilk, and see this as an extension of budget shopping (plus being a Yorkshireman I don’t like wasting my brass and frequently utter ‘ow much!’ several times a day).
If you haven’t yet looked at Temu, do give it the once-over and I think you’ll be surprised – and not least by the huge assortment of sex toys on offer.
This sounds like a recommendation for Temu doesn’t it? But it really unreservedly isn’t. There are various downsides, apart from receiving something that is frankly rubbish and/or doesn’t work and goes straight in the dustbin, because it’s not worth the hassle of returning or seeking a refund. Consequently, I avoid anything costing more than about £10 or that is mains electric operated. By way of example, I ordered a very cheap battery operated mini essential oil mister that just didn’t work and went straight into the bin. Despite false website claims of free delivery, only orders of £15 or more are free and paying for delivery of anything costing less is frankly cost prohibitive.
For me, the real annoyances are the numerous fake(?) competition based ‘special offers’ that I’m sure no one ever actually benefits from. These are time sensitive and operate only with a disabled search function so that shoppers are bombarded with details of things they definitely don’t want, and it’s nigh on impossible to put enough of the extremely random offerings, that you might want, into your online shopping trolley in the allotted time. Also be prepared to receive daily offers and all sorts of bogus inducements to place further orders. I simply delete these unread as an unwelcome form of cold-calling that frankly just isn’t British.
What I typically do when in need of free light entertainment, is to randomly browse the site putting anything that takes my fancy into my online shopping trolley. I then frequently review this and eliminate any more expensive duplicates that I’ve selected. Before actually placing my order, I decide if I really want to spend this much or whether I can easily live without a 49p plastic comb for removing herb leaves from their stalks? Sometimes I don’t bother ordering what I’ve picked at all, probably much to the annoyance of the Chinese Communist Party. It takes discipline, and getting a small order up to the £15 free delivery slot can also take some creativity – but this quickly becomes second nature to the savvy Temuer.
I’m quite keen on semi-precious stone samples and this is something Temu is awash with at mainly rock-bottom prices (get it!), and certainly significantly less than specialist UK outlets. Buyers might though not realise, despite the descriptions, that some are man-made, some artificially colour-enhanced and some simply pieces of glass, but others are amazing high quality mineral samples with some really professionally polished or display packed. Worth the risk? You decide.
I operate a strict limit on the price I pay for unseen goods coming out of China and suggest you do too. Have fun and don’t say that you haven’t been warned about the perils of on-line addiction.
Martin Rispin has had a career in many different sectors, most lately in the fields of English Tourism and Heritage based Urban Regeneration. He now lives, retired, in Kingston upon Hull.
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”plus being a Yorkshireman”
Ah! I knew there had to be a reason! We ‘Yorkies’ are often described as ‘Scots with the generosity kicked out of us’ ;o)
Geordies OTOH are described as ”Scots with their brains kicked out”
And another thing: ”If you haven’t yet looked at Temu, do give it the once-over and I think you’ll be surprised – and not least by the huge assortment of sex toys on offer.”
How come when a woman buys a vibrator, it’s seen as hot and sexy. but when a guy orders a 230V Fcukmaster Pro 5000, blowup latex doll with six speed pulsating pussy, elasticized anus with non-drip semen collection tray, he’s called a pervert? I think the Evri d/l man stole mine as it never arrived. :o(
Great post BTW Martin LMFAO!
”He now lives, retired, in Kingston upon Hull”
Don’t you like yourself?
Loved a run ashore in Hull back in the 70’s in the Andrew. Never failed to pull and get a legover. Must be something in the water in E.Yorks that has them gagging for it or else the Hull blokes have forgotten how to shag………… o|—)
You sound very knowledgeable on the subject! I take it the latest models are a step up from those we saw on Only Fools & Horses? Very funny, but yes, you do sound like a pervert! (And probably proud of it!) 😉
Sorry, wouldn’t touch Temu with a barge pole. Learned a lesson from buying a pair of boots from a company which claimed to be based in London, had a Union Jack and ‘London’ as part of their logo. The quality was terrible, and to cut a very long story short, I had to go through the bank to get a Debit Card action opened against them to get my money back, after several months of prevarication and to put it bluntly, blatant lies and bribery to get me to keep goods that were sub standard and I didn’t want. To qualify for a refund, I had to send the item to China, at my own expense, accompanied by various courier’s and custom’s forms – it would have been expensive and impossible. There was no initial info that the goods came from China, until I tried to get a refund. I would never have bought them otherwise. The bank investigated and found in my favour at first, but the company disputed it and said I had stopped communicating with them – bank reversed decision. I had kept every last bit of correspondence, sent it to bank, they then found in my favour again. The company then sent me a begging letter asking me to stop the action, as it was costing them money! My reply was, you had your chance to issue a refund, you refused, this is no longer negotiable The bank did get me a refund, but it was a hell of a lot of hassle. I’ve seen the Temu ads, some very tempting, but It just isn’t worth the risk – unless you’re stuck for something to do. Just my opinion. of course.
The writer’s warnings and advice not to buy expensive items is wise when it comes to Temu, some stuff definitely is worth the risk if you are prepared to simply write off occasional junk. At least for £15 you’re guaranteed some goods, compared to 3x£5 lotto scratch cards that invariably leave the gambler out of pocket.
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