Dr Green Will See You Now

I am not the first and, with any luck, won’t be the last to comment on the latest load of bollocks from the Royal College of Physicians (RCP). The RCP, about as woke a bunch as you could imagine, have surpassed themselves with their latest ten-page booklet (about ten pages too long) the Green physician toolkit. As a prime example of a solution in search of a problem, surely this is it.

The RCP have form in this regard, having already prioritised climate and sustainability as one of their policy priorities. In a not at all neutral, let’s assess the evidence way, they state that they want the Government to prioritise ‘a just transition from fossil fuels, redirecting all funding and subsidies to renewable energy sources and technologies and implement complementary policy initiatives to ensure this process does not exacerbate health inequalities.’

Where have they been burying their heads lately? The defeated ‘Conservative’ government and the new Labour government have referred to little else for the past five years, except climate change and renewable resources. And if they forget to prioritise these, they have plenty of people in Parliament to remind them. There’s always the Green Party (peace be upon them) who, in addition to long espousing green policies now seem to have espoused Islam. Then there’s the Liberal Democrats (neither liberal nor democratic), who can be relied on to support all manner of nonsense provided it adds to the general misery of the population.

And, ensuring that the process ‘does not exacerbate health inequalities’ is a bit rich. Part of their campaign involves, in addition to telling the Government what to do, also telling the NHS what to do. Thus, they call on the NHS to prioritise ‘initiatives to reduce the environmental impact of healthcare’ and to include ‘net zero targets’. One related NHS initiative is the introduction of electric ambulances. But these are liable to end up randomly scattered throughout the highways and byways of the nation, with a case already on record of one such ambulance having run out of electricity a mile from the hospital. It should serve to reduce the number of patients waiting in corridors, however. They can just be transferred directly to the morgue.

There is lots to keep the climate sceptic amused in the relevant section of the RCP webpage. Under the not evidence-based banner ‘Climate change represents the biggest long-term threat to human health’, there are links to their reviews on healthcare and sustainability, clean air, a climate ‘countdown’ from The Lancet and, of course, their latest gem the Green physician toolkit.

The booklet opens with ‘Climate change is one of the biggest threats to human health’ leading to an excess 250,000 deaths annually. Lucky for us, ‘More than half of this mortality is projected to take place in Africa’. But, to ensure that we are not complacent, ‘the UK will not be immune from the direct effects of extreme heat and flooding events, or’ – wait for it…’the inevitable arrival of climate refugees’. One could speculate on who that last comment is aimed at; no offence taken, I’m sure.

In the spirit of outright wokery, I am sure that the RCP will be perfectly happy to open the floodgates (no pun intended) to thousands of ‘climate refugees’. Just wait till they experience global warming UK-style, they’ll be clamouring to get back to their flooded and/or parched (delete as appropriate) savannas.

By the second paragraph – yes, all of the above was only the first paragraph – ‘climate change’ becomes the ‘climate crisis’ and the introduction ends by saying that the RCP has created the toolkit to ‘bring together evidence on the issue’ that can help physicians in their ‘day-to-day practice’. Sadly, the evidence that physicians were clamouring for such a momentous toolkit is missing.

The rest of the booklet has to be read to be believed, leading one anonymous physician to ask if the document was a ‘parody’. A lot of the advice throughout is about reducing unnecessary prescriptions and questioning if, for example, diagnostic imaging is necessary. I imagine that not many physicians will feel patronised by that advice. Folk should not ‘flush pills down the toilet’ for fear of contaminating the water supply. No mention of how a few antibiotics in our water supply might actually make it safer to drink given the amount of faecal contamination.

Of course, physicians must convert others to the cause and ‘encourage’ various sustainable practices amongst their colleagues. In the spirit of wasting even more time in meetings, physicians are encouraged to make climate change a ‘standing item in all clinical governance meetings’. That ought to reduce the consumption of sleeping tablets by the medical profession.

And then there’s a clincher about limiting the environmental impact of travel. Physicians should work from home on non-clinical days and hold more remote consultations and monitoring. Surely, the fact that clinicians have ‘non-clinical’ days is worrying enough without them not turning up to do nothing at the hospital. And who said that Covid-19 lockdowns were not softening us up for something? We can now rest assured that we may continue to be misdiagnosed from the comfort of our own homes.

The poor patient is not to be forgotten amongst all these wonders. Physicians are exhorted, liberally, to sprinkle gems of meteorological advice to their charges at every possible opportunity. The message must be kept simple and repeated often. The health benefits of ‘climate action’ are to be emphasised although the booklet does not contain any advice on which of padlocking yourself to railings or lying on the road in front of the oncoming traffic is more beneficial.

Physicians are to ‘avoid polarising language’ and not to ‘debate the science’. I imagine that works fine if you’re a doctor being consulted by Sir David (how long I got doc?) Attenborough or Greta Thunberg. But if, for example, Chris Morrison of The Daily Sceptic walked in, they might have a debate on their hands.

I leave you with this gem (not made up) which is given as an example of what a physician could say to a patient: ‘When cars burn petrol, they emit toxic air pollutants that can be bad for your health. Remember to carry an inhaler, avoid busy roads where possible and consider wearing a mask outside.’ As I may have mentioned already, who said Covid-19 lockdowns were not softening us up for something?

Roger Watson is a retired academic, editor and writer. He is a columnist with Unity News Network and writes regularly for a range of conservative journals including The Salisbury Review and The European Conservative. He has travelled and worked extensively in the Far East and the Middle East. He lives in Kingston upon Hull, UK.

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