The agonising wait is finally over. At last we can rejoice. Yes, June is here, bringing with it the occasional bout of warmer weather, barbecues, and of course Pride Month—a chance for us all to turn our attention to gay, lesbian, and bisexual rights, which have been completely off the agenda for the past 11 months. The suspense must be killing you to discover what the rainbow community has been up to during our last trip around the sun? Let me put you out of your misery: the LGBT acronym continues to grow, as more and more sexual identities decide they’d like to be part of a tiny, oppressed minority. In fact, the evolution and continued expansion of the acronym is quite interesting in its own right. Since they added the ‘Q,’ I often jokingly refer to the term as ‘LGBTQwerty’—a schoolboyish nod to the fact that the alphabet is running short of letters. At this rate, we may need to start going around again, like the car registrations do. Little did I know just how quickly my parody would be superseded by reality.
The latest iteration, as you’ll discover if you go anywhere near social media, is ‘2SLGBTQIA+.’ Really trips off the tongue, doesn’t it? I was doubtful that any prominent gay spokesmen would give it a shot; I hadn’t allowed, of course, for Justin Trudeau. Just a fortnight ago, Canada’s premier Al Jolson tribute act (who occasionally moonlights as the PM) was doing a Q&A session at the University of Winnipeg, and was asked if his government had a plan to protect all Canadians. Trudeau unleashed the acronym he’d obviously been up all-night rehearsing in front of the mirror:
It’s scary to see what’s happening in the United States. Whether it’s 2SLGBTQIA+ rights that are constantly being attacked. … My government will never let it happen. My government will always stand up unequivocally for women’s rights, for 2SLGBTQIA+ rights.
Don’t believe me? Take a look.
The alphabet soup in its current form stands for ‘two-spirit, lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer or questioning, intersex and asexual.’ The ‘+’ is there to highlight “all other identities that have yet to be captured by the acronym, making it clear that all forms of gender and sexuality are valid.” If all identities are valid, it kind of makes you wonder why you need an acronym in the first place?
An inharmonious smorgasbord
While a joyous community of kaleidoscopic gay disciples sounds idyllic, a cursory analysis of the acronym’s component groups makes it clear that this may just be the least harmonious smorgasbord in history. First, it was the threat of bisexual women to ‘lesbian spaces.’ Once they smoothed that over, LGB was going great guns until trans ‘women,’ also known as men, wanted to join. On one side of the aisle, you had lesbians making the reasonable complaint that trans ‘women’ (men) were erasing them; on the other side, there are those who wish to ban lesbians for their ‘terf’ (trans exclusionary radical feminist) stance. This is complicated somewhat by the fact that many lesbians feel pressured to have sex with trans women—i.e. men pretending to be gay women.
Moving on to ‘queer,’ we find ourselves in a bit of a quandary. Who better to dig us out of it than those experts in inclusivity, Oxfam? The charity likes to remind us that “queer joy is powerful,” “queer joy is empowering,” “queer joy is bittersweet,” “queer joy is resilient,” and of course “queer joy is for everyone.” However, in their Queer Joy Manifesto, they also remind us of the contradiction it poses:
Queer: Although historically a discriminatory term, this word is now being used as an umbrella term for people who are not heterosexual and/or cisgender. It is important to be aware that for some, particularly older members of the LGBTQIA+ community, the term ‘queer’ can still have negative personal connotations or be triggering.
Best in show, however, is quite clearly won by ‘asexual,’ which has earned itself a coveted spot on the rainbow team by not being sexually attracted to anyone. And while we’re at it, what the hell are the two-spirit animals doing pushing to the front of the queue? This is madness!
An exclusive club
Like other famous acronyms (NATO and the EU spring to mind), ‘2SLGBTQIA+’ is not an easy club to get into. However, it’s even harder trying to extricate yourself from it, a point nicely argued by Times columnist Matthew Parris some time ago.
But what, specifically, is the point of the latest acronym? The claim always made is ‘the need for inclusivity,’ but surely we can’t get much more inclusive, unless the entire population is included? My question is why not just assume everybody’s on-board? Why not, as the ‘+’ indicates, just take it as read that we’re all covered by the rainbow? Come to think of it, why not just assume everyone has equal rights (which they do), and bypass the entire charade altogether?
We know why my idea won’t fly. ‘2SLGBTQIA+’ has nothing to do with inclusivity—it’s about exclusivity. While minority groups continue to jockey for the ultimate victim status, they are united in their attack on the privilege trifecta: the straight, white male. That is the only group in society that one is not only at liberty to attack, but actively encouraged to. Constant attacks I can handle, but being forced to listen to politicians twitter on about ‘2SLGBTQIA+ rights’ every five minutes might be pushing it.
However, there is a larger point here. If everyone has a protected status, then no one does. Furthermore, if everyone is united against the villainous straight, white male (some would argue that has already been achieved), what happens next? Do the straight, white males flip the script, and become the oppressed minority? More to the point, do we get our own acronym?
This piece first appeared in The European Conservative, and is reproduced by kind permission.
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